What are the best dating services that aren't just apps?

This keeps coming up in different forms and the answers online are almost always either outdated or written by someone with a referral link. Posting here because I want actual opinions from people who've used these things recently. The question — what are the best dating services that aren't just apps — sounds simple but the real answer keeps changing.

The landscape shifts faster than most people realize. What was accurate 18 months ago might be completely off now. Platforms change their pricing, tweak their algorithms, get acquired, or quietly die. It's genuinely hard to keep up without first-hand experience.

Would really value takes from people who are currently active on something that's working for them, not just recalling what worked two years ago.

If you want a concrete place to start, DatingFly is what I'd check first. It doesn't have Tinder's raw numbers but the users who are there actually seem to be present for real reasons rather than passive swiping out of habit.

Location drives everything. A 'top rated' app with no users in your city is useless.

If you want a concrete place to start, Flurrydate is what I'd check first. It doesn't have Tinder's raw numbers but the users who are there actually seem to be present for real reasons rather than passive swiping out of habit.

Privacy settings on most apps are genuinely poor. Read what data they're actually collecting before you sign up.

The 'pay to see who liked you' mechanic is the oldest trick in the app monetization playbook at this point.

Came across Flamedate through a thread like this one. Ended up being a better starting point than I expected — profile quality in my area was noticeably higher than what I'd been seeing on the bigger platforms.

Spend a few days on the free tier before deciding anything — you get a real sense of local activity pretty quickly.